July 22, 2008
Who would have thought amusing myself at work would be so much…work?
Something sort-of exciting actually happened at work today! (here is where you gasp and say “Excitement? In a library employee’s life? No way!”)
You loyal readers recall how in my morning routine of delivering newspapers at the Administration Building on campus I have to enter the Public Relations office, the place where I hear lots of voices coming from the offices but have seen no people in there EVER? Well, today I almost ran into a live, breathing person in the Public Relations office! It was amazing!


(Yes, I do sometimes imagine that I am Indiana Jones to liven things up) OK, so I didn’t really scream, but I was quite shocked. I did manage to mumble a ‘good morning’ before scurrying away.
Then I found myself right back at my usual, more-than-slightly mind-numbing task of sorting periodicals and magazines and checking them into the computer system. But today, instead of just going on autopilot and letting my mind think on its own, I started to think about the things that I usually think about when my mind starts to wander as I work on autopilot (I know, I confused myself a little as I wrote that down). And then I took this inventory of the ways that I amuse myself while I work:
1) Ask myself a lot of inane and often unanswerable questions about the periodicals that I work with. I counted and the question I asked myself the most was “Who the hell reads this stuff?!”, which was followed closely by “Somebody wasted their time to write this?!” Some of the journals and magazines we get are ridiculous; for example, today we received the ‘Journal of Marriage and Family’, the ‘Journal of Marriage and Divorce’ AND the ‘Journal of Divorce and Remarriage’ (all separate journals-I do not jest). Again, I ask, “Do people actually subscribe to these?”
2) Analyze the covers of the magazines and determine what they should have done differently to get my attention. We get a lot of business and accountant magazines, which is funny because they often have a picture of a balding, pudgy, white middle-aged male with glasses and a nasty tie on the front looking very seriously at you, with a giant “PRACTICAL ACCOUNTANT” stamped right across the top in bold letters. It’s so cliché it makes me laugh.
3) Practice reading Roman numerals. I have to check the volume numbers of the journals that we get, and a lot of them still think that it’s cool to use Roman numerals. Fortunately for me, I have six years of Latin under my belt. I’ve made a game out of it - every one that I get correct right off the bat, I get a point, and if I get it wrong, I lose a point. I don’t like playing it, though, because it makes me depressed to think about how good I’m getting at it (I need a life!).
4) Look at the pictures in the magazines that go out in the spin rack. I have to put magnetic tape in all the magazines that end up in our spin rack (so that no one steals them), and I need to put the tape on a page that people aren’t really going to look at (usually an advertisement). So, I end up flipping through entire magazines, hunting for a spot to place the tape. I like this part of my job because it gives me an excuse to look at pictures in the magazines (because those are the most important part of any magazine). I’ve found the magazines with the pictures I enjoy most are Time, National Geographic, Newsweek, Vanidades (they have nice dresses), and Sports Illustrated. Sports Illustrated has the best photos out of them all, and it is actually the place that I found my awesome Batman ‘Got Milk’ ad that is now on my fridge. Sweet.


(I’ll tell you, I’ve been drinking a lot more milk lately)
5) Listen to my iPod and consider what my life soundtrack should sound like. I’ve decided that if someone ever decides to make a movie about my life, I want the score to be done by Hans Zimmer, Howard Shore, Danny Elfman, Carbonleaf, Enya, Cruxshadows, Josh Groban, Vanessa Carlton, Eurythmics, Nightwish, and Harry Gregson-Williams (all together), and a feature song to be the ‘Numa Numa’ song.
6) Sing along with my iPod. I have to be careful when I do this, because even though my desk is in its own separate room (with a couch that I am apparently not allowed to sit on, but that’s beside the point), the reference librarian in charge of periodicals has her office right next to mine and I can get a little loud (I don’t want her to think I need medication). Today was hard to keep it in, though, because four Josh Groban songs, D.H.T.’s version of ‘Listen to Your Heart’, and Madonna’s ‘Frozen’ came on my shuffle while I was working, and I dearly love singing along with them.
So, these are the sort of things that I do when I do the periodicals. When I get to the circulation desk, it’s a whole other story, but I’ve been mostly gossiping and reading. I finished ‘Persuasion’ by the fabulous Ms. Austen yesterday, and today I finished ‘Pride and Prejudice’. I’m not sure what to read afterward, though - it’s a toss-up between ‘Ivanhoe’ by that Walter Scott guy or ‘A Charmed Life’ by Diana Wynne Jones. I don’t think it much matters, since I’ve read all these books already.
















































